My Confession – Anger The Opposite of Love

The other day I was driving through downtown Atlanta with my wife to meet a friend for lunch. As we were cruising down Piedmont road a guy turned out in front of me from a side road and nearly caused me to hit him. I then honked my horn in protest to the fact that I had just been cut off.

About that time this guy slammed on his breaks, came up along side my car and started yelling at me. I thought to myself, This guy had already cut me off and now he was going to try and yell at me for honking???

I was not about to take what this guy was dishing out so I started to yell back. I went crazy. Cuss words were flying everywhere. It told the guy to pull over and we would see how big and bad he was then. The confrontation ended shortly after that by him turning down a side road.

This one is harder to share…

Some friends, my wife, and I went out to eat the other day at the Mexican restaurant. We were all having a great time until I decided to bring up politics. Something about this subject just puts people on edge. While dinner was concluding some of us had gotten into a pretty heated discussion.

Alicia and I then went home where we were going to meet our friends and play some cards. On the way home Alicia and I began to argue with each other. I think the tension of the conversation at dinner had carried over to our conversation and we were arguing like crazy.

Eventually I got so mad that I began yelling. I made the entire situation so uncomfortable that all of my friends went home. That made me even more mad because I had ruined the night. Alicia and I continued to fight and I continued to yell until eventually I yelled the words, “I hate you” to my wife.

Anger is a nasty beast. It has a way of creeping in to one’s heart little by little until one day they explode. Once anger fills the heart one’s ability to love ceases. Anger blinds love.

Unfortunately anger has become a reaction for me when I feel overwhelmed or challenged. I have been under so much stress lately that I am not allowing love to have it’s way and I am allowing anger to override. My anger led me to say words that I will forever regret. My anger led me to act in ways that are the total opposite of love.

The truth is there is nobody in this world that I love more than my wife, but yet I allowed my anger to say to her, “I hate you.” The truth is I love people like crazy and would do anything to help someone, but I allowed my anger to nearly get me in a physical altercation.

I was sharing my road rage story with a friend the other day when she said to me, “you should love the people in those cars the same way you do the homeless in downtown.” This truth was extremely difficult to hear. It challenged me at my core. I spend all day loving the people of downtown, but I can’t love the people in traffic? What does that say about my love? What does that say about me?

The purpose of this blog is to confess to you that I have reacted with anger and that I am walking away from that emotion. I am learning to transcend my anger with love. I have been forgiven by my wife for my words and we are continuing to learn how to love each other more and more. If I knew who the man in the car was I would apologize to him as well.

I want love to be at the forefront of all that I do. I don’t want to just be someone who loves at work, but not at home. I want to be a lover all the time in all circumstances and I want to live love to everyone who crosses my path.